99 Rules, Part 5

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5. If you’re staying more than one night, unpack.

Same goes for other things. Take the 10 minutes to establish yourself. Pick up your mess and get yourself settled before you go on your job. Whenever I have to work on something, I will bring out my toolbox and get myself established first. It makes it more comfortable, and less confusing. Be deliberate in your actions.

I can’t tell you how many times I have to yell at the kids when they come home from church and instead of putting their church clothes away, they just flop it out on the floor. It ruins the clothes as it gets trampled on, and it makes them difficult to find when Sunday rolls around again.

99 Rules, Part 4

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4. You don’t have to keep every secret, just the important ones.

Keeping too many secrets will only create tangled webs. On this rule, I would change for “you don’t have to”, to “You CANNOT”. People learn things, whether you want it or not. If you are holding on to everything or putting up a false front, you will be outed as disingenuous, and possibly be ostrasized (GOJ comes to mind).  However, airing your dirty laundry is not a wise idea either. Know the secrets you can keep (which are few), and pretend they don’t exist, to anyone.

I don’t have any secrets….See how that works?

A Cuckooed Coworker

I have a coworker who is divorced. I carpool with him and he tells me about his situation. He has two daughters who live with him. I am surprised, here in UT, divorce law almost always gives child custody to the mother. He rarely talks about her, so I just assume she is some druggie that cannot have custody.

Later on, he tells me he is moving, so I offer to help. I get my three oldest kids and take my pickup over. While there, his ex is there with her boyfriend, helping move. I find this odd. Then it dawns on me, his ex and boyfriend have a separate bedroom within the house. He has that couple living under the roof that he is buying. I kept my mouth shut about the whole situation.

It got me thinking, why would he put up with this? If I were in his shoes, I would throw them out so fast. But then it dawned on me. It is because of the family courts. He knows if they moved  out, the kids would go along with them. Despite she being extremely irresponsible and bringing this other guy in their house, the kids would be under her care.

In other conversations, I know he has zero desire to remarry, but he wants to remain a part of his daughter’s lives. So, he does what he can to maintain the status quo. It sucks that family law has reduced men to this.

Freedom – WB Fitness

We are going to start what is called the “No shitposting Rule”. Shitposts on these more lengthy articles are going to be deleted. We put too much work in these articles to appreciate irrelevant crap spewed out everywhere. Today, there will be a second “open thread article” which you may use as a toilet or grapefruit dumping grounds.

This is a repost from WB Fitness that he did awhile ago. One of the better articles I read, it brings Red Pill Philosophy into self improvement. –  Applicable to almost all areas of life. Continue reading “Freedom – WB Fitness”

Open Thread – Victim Blaming

Victim blaming is a touchy subject. The snowflakes view it as people siding with the enemy. The thing is, it it is trying to stop a bad situation from happening again. “Teach men not to rape” is an insulting and dangerous stance. 99.9% of the men do not rape, they go about their days and try to do what is right. The remaining 0.1% already know it is wrong, but they don’t care.

What is more, the “you didn’t do anything wrong” message when she put herself in compromising situations takes her autonomy away. If she did nothing wrong, she cannot do anything right, and will live in fear of that “random chance” happening again. The people who spread this message are effectively paralyzing the victims for the rest of their lives, telling them that their actions are useless.

Being an open thread, feel free to shitpost here, just not on WB Fitness’s article. Much appreciated.

99 Rules, Part 1

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1. Measure yourself only against your previous self.

Yeah, the question is whether you are improving or not, not how you are keeping up with the Jones’s. Nor should you measure yourself based on what others say about you. Becoming your better self is a matter of the road you are on, not where you have been.

WB Fitness is a prime example of this with his website. Weightlifting is a great measure, but if you are not into that, consider other aspects of your life. Your moral compass, your finances, your career, and your cooking skills are just a few of the ways you can improve.

In Sickness and in Health

Yesterday, I posted the article about having a large family on another page. I got this response from another guy:

“I was 1 of six and my wife was one of six and we had six ourselves. We also raised a niece and nephew for much of their childhoods as well so generally we had 7 to 8 children living in our home at any given time. Definitely a challenge, especially considering my wife is paraplegic and spent nearly half of her time in the hospital dealing with bone infection. I can remember back to a time when I had four children in diapers at the same time and a wife on bed rest for a year healing from a surgery. Try getting stuff done around the farm while watching 5 kids, definitely an interesting feat.

As for sleep, give it up, never going to happen, I would get the wife’s bandaging done around 2 to 3 am and then be up at 6 am to get the two older boys ready for school and haul them 12 miles to school. I would get back home just in time for the younger to start waking and then I would bath them dress them and feed them breakfast along with the wife. Then off to work hauling all of them around with me… I was doing well to get 3 to 4 hours of sleep a night. Luckily I have trouble sleeping so even under ordinary circumstances I could never sleep more than 4 1/2 hrs a night, so 3 to 4 wasn’t all that hard on me thankfully.

To which I reply:

“Sounds tough, your wife get sick?”

He responded:

“She was in auto accident in 2000 which left her paraplegic and with infection in some of her bone tissue. Over the years the infection in the bone has worsened to include 8 resistant bacteria which makes it tough to deal with. She lost her right leg 4 years ago due to the bone infection and at this point they refuse to do any surgeries on her anymore due to it being doubtful that she could ever heal up from them. Crazy enough though, we have had her on bed rest for a bit over a year and half and she somehow has managed to grow tissue over the exposed pelvis bone and is slowly healing again. She has lived for more 12 years longer than they originally gave her as an estimate. We are hoping she will still be around when the youngest is 18 and maybe even to see some or all of our children married and maybe even a grand child or two.”

Conclusion

Dang, sounds rough. The guy must really love his wife and kids to not just jump ship.

Consider this example, and then think of half of all marriages ending in divorce, most of which involve kids. These divorces are typically “I fell out of love”, or “irreconcilable differences” in which 70-75% are initiated by the woman (or man for the remainder if he knows it is a forgone conclusion). Commitment is a real thing, for men. And women wonder why guys are reluctant to commit to marriage. The reason is commitment is commitment, not to be taken lightly.