“Something did happen to me somewhere that robbed me of confidence and courage and left me with a fear of discovery and change and a positive dread of everything unknown that may occur.”
Those who have been a part of the red pill community for a while are probably very familiar with the concept of Dread Game even if they aren’t employing it. For many others, the term Dread Game sounds ominous, like some sick form of mental abuse that one spouse plays on the other.
It is true that some individuals utilize a darker version of the practice, but in actuality Dread Game is in and of itself, fairly benign. It is merely a tool; amoral, unfeeling, and subject to the intentions of the user. In this multi-part series, we will study the many aspects of Dread Game and how to successfully apply its principles to your own life. A word of caution however:
Dread Game is a powerful tool that can bring harmonious balance to your relationship or utterly destroy it. Take it very slow, allow months -not days or weeks- to see how the transitions affect the dynamics between you and your wife, and do not under ANY circumstances skip any of the prescribed steps.
Dread Game Defined
Put simply, Dread Game is the process of maximizing your attributes to be as attractive to the opposite sex as possible in order to cause a certain degree of apprehension in your significant other. Naturally, this apprehension should be from the thought of you appearing more attractive to other women.
The end result: Your girl will begin responding to you in a more affectionate manner, doting on you and seeking your approval.
Part of the reason Dread Game is so effective is due to women’s hypergamic nature. Women naturally seek out a man that they view as superior to them. This is due to the fact that they want the best provider that they can land to provide for her and her offspring. A man who is deemed her superior is likewise seen as someone who can find someone else should he lose interest in his current partner, therefore the woman pulls out all the stops to entice him to stay. In contrast, a woman who sees herself as the catch will expect the man to dote on her every whim.
The main rub between these two situations is that men are very easy to please as we typically have a few items on our checklist that rarely, if ever, change. Women on the other hand are a bundle of wires, constantly flicking on and off their wants, needs, and desires with no distinguishable pattern. A man trying to constantly cater to a woman who views herself as the superior in a relationship will leave him frustrated and fatigued.
Now many of you reading this are instantly thinking I’m referring primarily to finances when it comes to superiority in a relationship, but that’s not necessarily the case. True, money plays a part in Dread Game, but honestly it’s overshadowed by other aspects. For long term relationships, it is prudent to trigger other emotions within the female psyche as well:
- Abundance Mindset
- Amused Mastery
- Unshakeable Frame
Remember, if she feels she’s superior to you, she’ll lose respect for you and begin to take you for granted thinking that she’s the catch. Dread Game is a reversal of this dynamic where you set your life up to where she believes you are the catch.
A man with an abundance mindset exudes confidence. It goes beyond the old cliché of there being more fish in the sea. An abundance mindset can, and should, be applied to all facets of life; money, relationships, business, you name it.
On a subconscious level, a man with an abundance mentality mindset appeals to women because it displays the man is generous, confident, and self-sufficient.
Now don’t mistake someone with an abundance mindset as someone who just throws money or friends away. That’s just foolish. Rather, someone with an abundance mindset simply knows that what can be lost can also be regained or improved.
You break up with your long term girlfriend? There’s someone better out there anyways.
A big business deal fell through? There’s plenty more deals to make.
Ponder on this throughout the day. You’ll find that most of the things you fret about make little difference in the long run and are easily fixed or replaced. That’s the power of the abundance mindset.
Are you a father? Did you ever wrestle with your kid or listen to them explain why you should allow them to stay up late and eat a tub of ice cream? Like me, you’re probably chuckling to yourself as you recount their wholehearted, if not underwhelming, attempts to take you down or debate you.
You grinned during the whole back and forth because in the end, you knew what the outcome was going to be. You are the father, the master, playing with your child.
Now expand that concept out to others. Perhaps your wife has gotten her knickers in a twist over a rather mundane issue. What do you do? Do you get pulled into her frame and match her level of frustration or do you laugh it off and move on? It seems like a rhetorical question, but look back at the spats you’ve had with your wife. Many, if not most, of them are over pretty trivial things, right?
Some may call it misogynistic, but you must treat an upset women like you would treat a child throwing a tantrum. It is merely a flurry of emotion and when the moment passes she will either A) completely forget it happened or B) come back to apologize later for blowing up on you. Let her wrath roll off your back like water on a duck. Where she succumbs to her emotions, you must restrain yours or else you are also reduced to a childlike status. Furthermore, this reduces your standing in their eyes.
Learn to recognize these outbursts for what they are, shit tests, and handle them accordingly. Unless it is something truly serious, keep your temper in check (admittedly, something hard to do in the heat of the moment), and deflect the issue until she has time to calm down.
We’ve touched on this already, but haven’t really defined it. What is frame?
Someone’s “frame” is their mindset and emotional state. It’s how you handle a conversation with that hot chick at the bar. It’s how you defuse an argument with your spouse or a belligerent patron. Frame is your own little bubble of comfort. A man who can stay in his frame during a vicious assault earns the admiration of those around him. An unshakeable frame is synonymous with unshakeable confidence.
I forget where I heard this metaphor, perhaps from Rollo, but think of your frame as an actual picture frame. During any interaction, take a moment to reflect:
- Who’s holding the picture frame?
- What is currently being shown within the picture frame?
- How is the image within the picture frame being portrayed? Negatively or favorably?
Our next post in this series will cover Level 1: Recognizing and Passing Shit Tests. Stay tuned for some real life examples and in depth analysis on the different kinds of tests and some appropriate responses to each.
In the meantime, take some time to read up on the concepts of Abundance Mentality, Amused Mastery, and Unshakeable Frame. Don’t begin to apply them yet if you do not have a comfortable and thorough understanding of them yet. Focus on gaining a greater grasp of their principles and allow them to gel in your mind.
Some additional homework is to begin reading up on the 48 Laws of Power. This is not a book you will just skim through. Read it one chapter at a time. Take notes. Brainstorm multiple applications of each rule. Think of real life situations where you’ve seen this rule being played out. The 48 Laws of Power will be your primer into handling all social interactions.
Stay tuned and stay strong.