Sex for the Red Pilled Married Man

A huge part of the red pill is raising your SMV, having solid game, and attracting and having sex with women.  Married guys have it similar, but the parameters are different.   While certain aspects of game can be less important, other aspects are under constant scrutiny.  Today we’ll go over what a normal functioning married sex life should look like, and how you can go about fixing a dead bedroom.

Dual Responsibility

When you get married, its an agreement on many things.  One of which is to only have sex with one woman.  Many guys find this boring or crazy, but the married life isn’t for everyone.  When you meet a woman and decide to get married, you look a certain way.  Its unfair to your wife if you turn into a lard ass slob.  Its unfair to you if she lets herself balloon up into a ham planet.

SMV still exists when married, and keeping yourself in shape and making sure your wife stays in shape is key to being happy sexually.  Despite what the modern world tries to tell you, attraction is 100% important. As a man, you lead by example, and its up to you to make sure fitness is important to your family.  If one person’s SMV falls too low then you can’t blame the other person for losing attraction.  I like to say keep it where it was when you met, or ideally strive to make yourself look better.

Frame & Game

Physical looks are one part of it, but if you’re to have a ton of sex whenever you want your frame and game must be on point. If you don’t have a strong frame to pass shit tests, she’ll view you as inferior and will be turned off.  This is red pill 101 theory but a married guy spends way more time with his wife than a guy just trying to hook up with a random girl.  Your wife will shit test you and having a rock solid frame is what will defeat them.

he failed the test

Game is just as important when married.  Knowing how to get your wife from tired, post work mode into your personal sex puppet takes some skill, but nothing you can’t handle.  Being the lovable asshole seems to be the ticket for most married guys.  I’ve noticed that what a woman who is working all day and at soccer practice at night seems to respond to is spontaneity.  Women love when you spring a surprise on them and grabbing her like a hungry lion can work.  You have to time it right though and make your desires clear and concise.

Each of the points I’ve listed above depend on each other.  It starts with making yourself look better which then leads to your wife actually respecting you as a man, which leads to your game resulting in sex.  I think couples tend to overthink it at times and second guess themselves.  If you’re married and not having sex, its your fault, and only you can fix it.

You Make The Call

Once again if you’re only having sex with one woman, it should be something you get whenever you want.  Obviously there are things like time constraints or your wife having the flu but in general you shouldn’t be asking for sex, you should be telling her you’re going to have sex with her.  Too many guys leave sex up to the woman to decide and as noted above, women respond better to fun new things.  Also, sex is something that you should both want to do.  Don’t let your wife be the “gate keeper” and tell you when you can and can’t have sex.  It should be a mutual thing that you both want to keep your relationship happy.

You have to be open about sex too.  No cutesy terms, no shame, no bullshit.  You’re a man speaking to a woman, his woman, about sex and nothing gives them the tingles than a guy talking dirty to them.  It all circles back to women wanting to feel that they’re with the most alpha guy they can find.

Keeping It Interesting

Guys, if you’re climbing on top of your woman to missionary fuck her for the billionth time and she’s laying there with all the emotion of the mattress beneath her, you need to work on your skill.  This is the only woman you get to have so you need to lead the charge here as in other parts of your marriage.  Switch things up every now and again.  Try different places (legal places please), different times of the day, have her wear an outfit and heels for you.  Doing the same old thing every time can get boring.

When To Say No

Denying her requests and working on some married dread game can help boost things too.  If you come across as a desperate, uncontrolled lunatic that’s bitching about wanting to fuck it isn’t going to help your cause.  There are times to ignore your wife and let her own thoughts brew in her head.  This keeps her wondering if you still are attracted to her and more times than not, she’ll think you’re attracted to someone else.  You don’t have to have a side piece for this to work, the psychology is what is key here.

A word of caution though I must stress is that ignoring her too much will have dire effects as well.  You and your wife are a unit, each with different tasks to accomplish the same shared goal.  Being too cold or distant can cause her to start questioning everything you have together and if you’re truly happy with her, you don’t want to fuck that up over some dread game.  Its truly a fine line, but most readers here get the point.


To recap, sex while married doesn’t have to be a life of misery.  I can tell you that I have a very happy, thriving sex life and it’s still fun and interesting.  Key takeaways are:

  • Fitness: Staying fit yourself and making sure your wife understands that you deserve something nice to look at as much as she does.  You’re in this for the long haul and you owe this to each other.


  • Frame & Game: Passing shit tests and proving your worth to yourself will be noticed by your wife. Keeping a solid frame will ensure that she respects you and wants to please you.  Also, how you interact with her and being open about your intent without looking desperate is key.


  • On Your Terms: Sex is not some magical carrot on a string to be dangled out in front of you. Your intent and desire should be looked upon as a duty, just like you have duties to uphold.  In truth, sex should be something your woman desires with you as much as you desire with her.


If you’re having trouble with your sex life with your wife the topics here can help fix things.  If nothing else, it can at least get the gears turning by getting you to talk to your wife about the needs you have as a man.  Remember to be patient but determined in your delivery, and keep that frame sharp, especially when you first bring up the topic.  Also, just remember to keep it simple and don’t over complicate it.  Don’t let your own head get in the way of the other.


-J. Nyx

Author: Jnyx

Fitness addict, DIY guru, tech nerd, member of Memesters Local 419.

3 thoughts on “Sex for the Red Pilled Married Man”

  1. Keep it interesting, mix it up. The other night, my wife had some church activity to go to. While she was away, I got the sleeping bags out. Instead of letting her walk home (1.5 blocks), I put a video in for the kids and met her at church, then drove her up in the mountains for some “stargazing”.

    1. Absolutely Jim. When you’re with a woman for so long, even the simplest change up can have great results.

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