The 10 Commandments: Family Edition

“Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.”

-Proverbs 22:6

Many men start creating a family without taking time to building some “family laws” that everyone is expected to follow.  As such, a lot of the early years of a marriage and raising children is filled with unnecessary stress as everyone’s expectations are askew.  

This can be easily solved by creating a list of expectations, or commandments, that everyone in the family are to follow.  Putting pencil to paper on this, however, can be a bit daunting so I’m going to try to provide some guidance on creating your own family’s 10 Commandments.

Involve the Entire Family

Trying to lay down the law your family will follow without any input from your wife will breed contempt.  Involving her in the process, even if she doesn’t offer up much herself, will make the medicine go down easier, so to speak and help ensure her commitment to the family rules.

The same holds true for your children.  Sitting them down and requesting their input will make them feel like part of the process and they will develop a sense of pride and duty to following the rules.

As the man of the house, your job is to lead.  Part of leading is requesting input from your team (family in this case).  Ultimately, you may make the final decision, but requesting their feedback promotes respect in your decision-making and show them that you care about their thoughts and feelings.  It’s the difference between dominant and domineering.

Focus Them Around Your Core Values

Before setting your family down to hash out your list of rules, take some time to determine what values you want to promote.  Ideally, these rules will promote values such as self-reliance, loyalty and compassion to other family members, and the building up and maintenance of the family and household.

Some examples might be:

  1. I will do my part keeping our home clean and orderly.
  2. I will do for myself what I can before asking for help.
  3. My family comes first.

This brings us to our next point…

Keep Them Concise

Your commandments can be as detailed or general as you wish, but I suggest creating a balance between the two extremes to allow some level of flexibility.  Let’s take the first example rule from above and take them to the extremes to help illustrate this:

  • General: “The house shall remain clean” – Okay…who’s cleaning the house?
  • Detailed: “Mom will do the laundry and dishes.  Dad will mow the lawn and take out the trash.  Susie will pick up the toys.  Johnny will sweep the floors…” – Kind of ruins the point of a concise list of family commandments and leave little leeway to switch things around.

Work on keeping each family rule balanced between the two extremes  to help avoid confusion as well as allowing for flexibility.

Post Them Up

After your family has created and agreed up your family commandments, print them out and put them up somewhere where everyone will see it.  Your family commandments can be as simple as a sheet of paper on the fridge, but for maximum effect, make it a big production and hang it somewhere prominent.

If you have any woodworking skills, you might engrave your commandments on a large piece of wood or you can take the more traditional route and inscribe them on stone tablets.

What commandment suggestions can you think of?  Leave them down below in the comments section.

Author: Jak

Jak, married and father of three, seeks to help the Red-Pill Community take its next step past the petty cynicism and ineffectual anger. While he recognizes that men are significantly handicapped by the modern legal system and culture, he doesn't accept that traditional marriage is untenable in today's social climate. Rather, men must be willing to adapt to this new world by implementing new tactics and approaches to maintaining a balance of power. Jak is here to provide you with these lessons.

  • EastsideProphet

    Thy shalt not date until thou art sixteen years of age. Sixteen is the number years thou shall be before thou art allowed to date. And the number of years shall be sixteen.

    Seriously, start laying the foundation of that one early, and speak of it often. One could also think of it as a family Constitution.

    Proverbs 22:16.. If your kid becomes a hellion, there’s going to come that day. They may be “old” before they embrace it. You might not live to even see it. But there will come a time when your loving foundation and example will convict that hellion, and they will likely return to their (your) principles.

    • Jak

      A family:
      10 Commandments
      Constitution
      Business Plan

      The list of possible variations goes on…

  • Stoic Nihilist

    “Insightful comment”

    • EastsideProphet

      Whoa.. mind blown.

  • Sir Lee

    so what happens these days at a school dance for 11-13 year olds?
    daughter says that none will even dance.
    Not sure what to tell her – or what is typical…

    • cheeseburgercheeseburger

      kids watch other kids dance on youtube on their smartphones.
      teens are NOT dating much these days(although I dont doubt they engage in meaningless hookups via apps)

      • Sir Lee

        last year 2 boys asked my kid (11) to be “gf”. she ran away. so did a few other girls that were asked out.
        boys cried.

        this year – not sure to say whether she is permitted to dance? at 12

        I asked out several women yesterday – they ran away too….

        • John Galt

          “boys cried.”

          Holy Toledo. They should run then.

          • UnreconstructedConfederate

            At that age I just got mad and said things like,”I ain’t never talking to that bitch again!”. Well, I did until I learned I might change my mind at a later date.

        • UnreconstructedConfederate

          It’s only works for them if they can run faster than you.

        • John Galt

          “I asked out several women yesterday – they ran away too….”

          The lasso and bolas are your friends.

          • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

            But what if you’re messaging a chick on a dating website and she runs away? Would you then use an e-bola?

            • bem

              ha!

            • John Galt

              Wah wah! Fozzy bear in the house.

        • dckhead_con_artist

          maybe they had to pee really bad?

          • Sir Lee

            shit just aint working anymore –
            several daytime good interactions telephone exchange – txt later.
            nothing…

            edit: have 2nd date with one of them – but so much fucking txting/nonsense…
            how I miss the good old days.

            • dckhead_con_artist

              these days they give out the phone numbers just to make you go away and then block you.

              • Sir Lee

                awesome.

              • bem

                RIP Attention spans….

                • cheeseburgercheeseburger

                  thats actually a great idea. good thing only one woman reads this site.

                • Ainigmaris Thales

                  Wait, what were we talking about?

            • cheeseburgercheeseburger

              use Lloyd Dobbler game- get 80s boom box, stand outside her apt bldg, play “In Your Eyes” by Peter Gabriel…she may call the cops on you, but I guarantee some other broad in the bldg will want to date you

              • bem

                He’ll be awash in misty-eyed 45 yr olds…….

                • cheeseburgercheeseburger

                  35-45 Id say

                  • bem

                    dood – that movie was like ’86.

                    • cheeseburgercheeseburger

                      89.

                    • bem

                      huh.
                      but still!

              • I would rather use Lloyd Bridges. Not only did he pick the wrong day to give up drinking, but if you are on the ungodly island of long it is the only way to cross the lloyd harbor

                • bem

                  you think you’re better than him!

              • Sir Lee

                Peter Gabriel – so depressing – think that’s why I initially went backpacking round the world and ended up in NYC.

              • Consolation_of_Philosophy

                Get 80s boom box, stand outside her apt bldg, play “Shock the Monkey” by Peter Gabriel.

                • cheeseburgercheeseburger

                  that would get you sent to the psych ward in Bellevue Hospital

                  • You would be surprised. I have seen a shocking amount of boom boxes lately (shock the monkey still get you sent to bellevue). In fact, it part of the overall return to the 80’s. Have you noticed more white table cloth Chinese restaurants? Homeless? Breakdancing? Arsineo recently had a reboot of his show. The gorillaz have a new album out this year. Mark my words, you will see ghostbusters running around the streets within 6 months.

                • Jim Johnson

                  My first attention from a girl came in 5th grade, I brought a boom box to school and played “Better Love Somebody” by Bruce Springsteen. She had hair down to her butt.

              • UnreconstructedConfederate

                I wonder if ever in the history of the world, did something that cheesy work?

                • cheeseburgercheeseburger

                  yes, from 1990-1994

                  • UnreconstructedConfederate

                    You tried that? You’re not like, gay are you?…..or Kersey?

                    • bem

                      For a period of time it seemed like faegs and brits were pulling down all the bitches…

                    • UnreconstructedConfederate

                      I heard girl say one time that she liked hanging with gays so she could get a mans perception on things without him trying to get her in bed.
                      I said, yeah that makes perfect sense.

                    • bem

                      wow…..
                      how to get her in bed is a mans’ ONLY perspective!!!!

                    • cheeseburgercheeseburger

                      I was in HS those years, every chick on the planet loved that movie. 1995, they switched over to Tupac and Puff Daddy

                    • UnreconstructedConfederate

                      You were gay in high school then changed your mind later?

                    • bem

                      Tupac changed it FOR him it sounds like…

                    • cheeseburgercheeseburger
                    • UnreconstructedConfederate

                      Ok dude, you get props for admitting it.

                    • bem

                      were you a skate rat?

                    • cheeseburgercheeseburger

                      40% grunge, 40% guido, 20% hood…Iwas all fuct up

                    • bem

                      hahahahha it was a transitional era!

                    • culture mutt

                    • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

                      Not sure if I mixed themes much, but I did go through phases where I was more or less one theme. Growing up is weird.

                • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

                  Just reconfirming what others have said.

                  Dude, back in ’86 I managed to pull a chick lifeguard by walking up to her “sit 8 feet in the air” high seat on the beach, smiling, and reciting Shakespeare to her. Specifically, and I shit you not, the balcony scene Romeo dialogue (just a few lines, where he basically says Juliette is hot).

                  She blushed and introduced herself and said how much I made her day and we went out later that evening when she got off work.

                  Man, I really, really miss the 1980’s.

                  • cheeseburgercheeseburger

                    for me its more like “Man, I just missed the ’80s”

                    • bem

                      I was there and STILL missed them somehow…

                  • John Galt

                    Second that.

                  • UnreconstructedConfederate

                    I’m really glad it worked out for you…although I’m not sure I would have admitted to doing that.
                    I’m with you though, even though there were problems back then, the world was still right side up in those days.

                    • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

                      Oh I feel no shame about it whatsoever. It was a totally different time. And if you break it down as “Game”, I had the confidence to walk up to a hot bikini chick in one of those “popular hot girl professions”, didn’t even bother to give her my name, threw down absolute cornball silliness without blinking an eye (I actually hammed up the cheese factor) and then got the girl to go out with me the minute she got off her shift. And to be honest, I really didn’t expect her to respond to it, so I had a no fucks given, devil may care attitude about it. But, as always, it helps to be 6’3.59″ and jacked (especially at the time, I was in the military and nearly lived in the gym).

                    • bem

                      .59!!!!

                    • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

                      The way I figure it, the 9 rounds the 5 up to 6, and the 6 then rounds the 3 up to 4. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it!

                  • Consolation_of_Philosophy

                    That is fearlessly cool.

                  • “Man, I really, really miss the 1980’s.”

                    I really miss being in diapers and not having to worry about anytihng

                    • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

                      Never fret, you’ll get to experience that again eventually.

                    • So how is it?

                    • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

                      I’ll never know, my plan is to replace all of my failing parts with robotics, as they fail, until all that’s left is my brain and fifteen hundred pounds of titanium powered by nuclear fusion awesomeness.

                    • POWER ARMOR

                    • bem

                      legit ‘o snap!’ earned.

            • dckhead_con_artist

              next time, take the number and post it on Craigslist. In the old days her number would be plastered above every urinal.

              • Sir Lee

                I’ve been advised from an expert that since I’m mid fifties to go for women 40-45. And forget about the 22 year old cheer leader with a PHD in bitcoin mining…
                much better chances

            • AutomaticSlim

              I miss the good old days too.
              For me that was 1986 – 1990.
              11th Ave from 28th to 46th.
              Could get a date whenever I wanted.
              Any time of the day or night.

              • Sir Lee

                actually been there – crack whore $5
                now its $300 with lots of teeth in the way

          • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

            Are you suggesting that they were Asian girls and that they sensed a can of Coke nearby?

        • bem

          Some shit never changes….

        • UWOTM8
        • MCGOO

          Junior high is approaching too quick. In Jr high, many kids will witness for the first time same age males and females making out in the hallways. The promiscous kids from single mothers mingle with helicopter kids, stolen foster kids, ghetto kids bussed in, well kept religious kids and red pill kids. They are all lumped into the facility like sardines and then the real brainwashing begins.

          The promiscous kids have seen and learned carousel skank action first hand from their own mother and likely emulated it themselves in the local parks over the summer nights when their mother tossed them out past curfew so she could get her clam steamed by another nappy garbage man. And the school system continues teaching more options for young females to totally collapse the next generation of households.

          THEN apes from more single apemothers are bussed in from the demographically ‘lopsided’ zipcodes – lopsided like this haircut:

          https://www.pkwy.k12.mo.us/north/academics/practicalarts/Web_2_Projects/wiley_website/images/TheGumbyBlue.jpg

          Your kid will be exposed to it all in public school. She may walk into the girls bathroom and witness an old classmate from elementary school sharking and fellating on GUMBI. Whooh single mothering needs bleached and fumigated out of our culture like Vietnam jungle foot rot I’m telling you.

          Tweens and adolescents go through rapid changes, and public social marxist schooling doesn’t help steer them right one bit. Be prepared to do a lot of explaining when she comes home with stories and questions like “Is it normal or okay for peers to be doing such and such?”

          • Sir Lee

            That is true.
            This is why we are fucked.
            Luckily my kid goes to private school.

    • UnreconstructedConfederate

      Not sure about the present time , but in the Stone Age there wasn’t much dancing at parties at that age that I recollect.

  • UnreconstructedConfederate

    Don’t step out of this house if that’s the clothes your gonna wear, I’ll kick you out of my home if you don’t cut that hair.

    • Sir Lee

      the clothes is important. sucks that I have to do it…. Mother? fuck her

    • Jak

      Your mom did that too? My mom always busted in and said “what’s that noise?!” to which I’d always reply “aw you’re just jealous. It’s the Beastie Boys.”

      • UnreconstructedConfederate

        You gotta fight!

        • AutomaticSlim

          Ma threw away my best porno ma-ag!

        • AutomaticSlim

          1986 seems just like yesterday.

      • dckhead_con_artist

        I thought it was “Bring the Noise !” with Anthrax/Public Enemy

    • B1k3_Ch41N

      But did/do you dress the way you’re requiring your child to dress? Leading by example is something that I plan to do if I have children. Hypocrisy is the type of behavior that children pick up very easily in adults, and is something that pissed me off the most about my parents. It can seriously harm the parent child relationship.

      • UnreconstructedConfederate

        You don’t like the Beastie Boys?

        • cheeseburgercheeseburger

          hes not from Merka

          • UnreconstructedConfederate

            Commie.

        • B1k3_Ch41N

          Lol same happened to me. He doesn’t smoke nowadays and has managed to give up a 20 year habbit.

          • UnreconstructedConfederate

            It’s a song, silly furiner:)

            • B1k3_Ch41N

              Sorry pal I don’t speak Murican.

              • UnreconstructedConfederate

                This is a murican website and we speak murican herebouts. 🙂

                • bem

                  YOU JUST DOXD JAK!

                  • UnreconstructedConfederate

                    I hate when that happens.

                  • Jak

                    Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuu……..

                • B1k3_Ch41N

                  K.

              • John Galt

                Despite not being Retro 80s night, for your entertainment and the source of the tag lines.

                • cheeseburgercheeseburger

                  RIP guy in the middle.

                • UnreconstructedConfederate

                  I think he must be from Mongolia or somewhere to have never heard that:)

                • Jim Johnson

                  First thought when I saw one of those videos was “Those boys aren’t very Beastie at all, are they?”

                  • John Galt

                    Well, wasn’t the whole BB album a running joke? Skinny, NYC jewish kids putting on a front like they were convicted felons? It was good enough for 80s house party noise.

                    • Jim Johnson

                      Like Bon Jovi, I wish I never seen one of their videos.

                    • John Galt

                      Played to death. I still turn the radio station when “Living on a Prayer” starts.

                    • Jim Johnson

                      Great music, but some (or most) bands are better heard than seen.

                    • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

                      Yeah, I’m over most Bon Jovi just like that, but I do still like Wanted Dead or Alive, it’s one of my go-to karaoke crowd pleasing songs.

                    • AutomaticSlim

                      “Ad-Rock” father was some kind of a big shot.

                    • Max Tweeter

                      Yeah, and they HATED that “Fight For Your Right…” song; it was done as a goof, but every cock-rock FM station still takes it seriously, 30 yrs later.

                • B1k3_Ch41N

                  Cheers buddy.

      • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

        There are shortcuts around some of that. Use the tools that society and culture give you when possible so as to take the focus off of “dad’s being a dick” and placing it on society as a whole. That sounds weird, but what I mean is things like smoking and drinking. “But dad, you drink!” “Yes son, I do, but I am of the legal age to do so, if you did it, it would be illegal. When you turn 21, you can drink too.” And so on. You don’t deny them so much as redirect them and place a “Just have to wait a bit” thing in their heads. When they finally get to 21 (or whatever convention you used) the notion of hypocrite and “I’ll show him!” have long, long since faded. But going the “You can’t drink, it’s a bad habit! Forbidden and never start it” will just breed contempt if you yourself crack open a cold one on the weekend.

        • UnreconstructedConfederate

          Reminds of some companions in school, those who had the strictest parents were some of the wildest kids whenever they had a chance.

          • bem

            Those pastor’s kids….total hellions.

            • UnreconstructedConfederate

              She could…..never mind.

            • Hey now

            • youre turning me into a criminal when all i want to be is a petty thug

              • bem

                I never wanted this for you….

                • I knew Santino would have to go through this.

                  • bem

                    Not nearly as much as things wound up going through him!

        • B1k3_Ch41N

          We’re not talking about smoking or drinking here GOJ, these habits things are easy to explain. What I’m referring to is simple things such as my dad agreeing with my mum about me not being able to go pheasant hunting because she’s terrified of guns after she fired a shotgun once.
          My father went hunting the week before.
          That was a long time ago when I was about 16.

    • Jim Johnson

      Then mom comes in yelling, What’s that noise? Mom’s just jealous.

  • Thou shalt not bitch and complain.

    Commandment number 1

    • John Galt

      Unsurprisingly the oldest child (aka. wife) is the biggest violator of that commandment.

      • dckhead_con_artist

        I never could figure out why The Bible allows a man to marry another man’s previous wife but not allow her to comeback to the previous husband. If a woman comes back, you got the green light to beat her ass

        • John Galt

          Don’t know. Me thinks the Bible gave a husband leeway to correct his wifes behavior, but I still think sending her back to her family and keeping the dowry (if any) is the way to go.

          • dckhead_con_artist

            The Puerto Rican neighbors tell their daughters that they are not allowed to comeback. Everything with Puerto Ricans is ass backward, no way we could make them the 51st state.

            • bem

              I thought whoever knocks up the daughter just moves in?

              • dckhead_con_artist

                fuck if that is the case. I will gladly knock up a Puerto Rican so I can sell my house

          • bem

            there’s always the local monastery…

        • AutomaticSlim

          “I never could figure out why The Bible allows a man to marry another man’s previous wife…”

          Is there an option to marry the teenage daughter instead?

          • dckhead_con_artist

            a package deal! just like these bitches say on their Tinder profile.

    • Stoic Nihilist

      Feature your comment. It’s the best one on this thread today!

      • Ainigmaris Thales

        Downvote.

    • 0bsoleteMan

      I’d add 2 caveats to that:

      1. Thou shall not bitch and complain about old problems. Old can mean 6 months, a year, or some other interval.
      2. Thou shall not bitch and complain about current problems without presenting a means to resolve or manage them.

  • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

    One of the general rules we had was to always be present for sit down dinners, no electronic devices permitted at the table. Started from day one of their having an electronic device and never wavered from it. Result is my two adult children can hold conversations like normal human beings, and they eschew their iZombies still when eating, and they prefer to actually have meals with other people instead of retreating to their caves, which makes them much more social than the average Millenial.

    Cleaning was a freaking lost cause, my daughter is a Mess Tornado and has been since she started walking. Not that I haven’t hounded her that entire time, but she literally still has no concept of putting things away when she’s done with them. No freaking clue why.

    As to commandments, one word of advice. As important as having them is, also equally important is consistency from you and your wife in enforcing them. Once in a while you’ll absolutely need to make exceptions, but these should be infrequent and only for a super-major good reason, otherwise the kids come to just see them as you and mom being dorky and they go about their own business.

    • UnreconstructedConfederate

      Sounds like my daughter, who also after all these years has failed to discover that light switches have two functions, turning the light on and OFF.

      • dckhead_con_artist

        unless it is a 2 way switch or dimmer !

        • UnreconstructedConfederate

          That would be a hopeless situation for her lol

          • dckhead_con_artist

            that’s my life, then the bulb explodes!

        • cheeseburgercheeseburger

          If only women had dimmers for how much they talk…

          • dckhead_con_artist

            Timers would be preferable.

          • bem

            fade their ass right out…..

    • 0bsoleteMan

      I think all daughters are mess tornados. My younger son’s room is much cleaner and far better organized than her’s.

  • bem

    Arguably off-topic:
    I need investors. I had the best idea in the world today: A Vietnamese/Soul Food fusion restaurant – Pho Sho!!!

    • cheeseburgercheeseburger

      youve been dying to post that since you hopped in the car this morning. bet you did 80 mph all the way to the office. and Im pretty sure I been to a restuarant like that, w.o the awesome name lol

      • bem

        worse – I was stuck on a bus giggling to myself. Last time that happened some little girl’s dad broke my jaw.

        • cheeseburgercheeseburger

          that name would induce aneurysms in many a sjw; I say go for it…and Im serious, think russell simmon’s ex wife(asian) opened up a shirt-lived restaurant like that eons ago

    • UnreconstructedConfederate

      A rizzle sizzle in the wok Pho Sho!

    • AutomaticSlim

      I’m in!
      This guy can be the spokesman:

      • cheeseburgercheeseburger

        bruce lee-roy! great b-movie

    • Boothe

      I want to open up an African-American / Mexican restaurant. We’ll call it “Nacho Mama’s”

  • dckhead_con_artist

    The article, suspiciously, sounds like the design reviews at work. Input from cross-functional groups are required, yet nobody makes a decision.

    • bem

      I am the head of this family – right or wrong!!!!

    • dckhead_con_artist

      Didn’t he keep a backup?

      • bem

        could say he downloaded it “FROM THE CLOUD”!!!!

        amirite?!? hah? hah?

        • dckhead_con_artist

          WIN!

        • very nice

        • KEKT

        • UWOTM8

          Gentlemen, we have reached peak Bem.

          • bem
    • B1k3_Ch41N

      That’s fake. Everyone knows that Moses got the commandments from God on a USB stick.

      • dckhead_con_artist

        He avoided any Network Errors or the possibility that half of a commandment would get misinterpreted.

    • UnreconstructedConfederate

      It’s my way or the cobblestone path.

      • dckhead_con_artist

        Someone has the daunting task of Krazy Gluing that shit together.

        • UnreconstructedConfederate

          I always thought the horse doody held it together? Mexicans gotta work though.

          • dckhead_con_artist

            they were on siesta when Moses came back from the bush.

            • nyeah see we gonna build a golden caf see take it back to pharroah see nyeah nyeah

              (best casting decision in history)

              • bem

                the ONLY jew on set!

                • really though, he couldn’t break character. He was Little Caesar Enrico in Egypt. Gonna be coitins fa ya moses, see, nyeah. nyeah joshua, she came to me by her own free will, nyeah nyeah

              • dckhead_con_artist

                no wonder why we can’t find the golden calf, the beaners strapped it to the roof of the car along with the hay mattresses and it fell off on the interstate,

                • say what you want about roof strapping. After 9-11 when every dipshit tied an american flag to their car because helping it took all of about 2 weeks before the entire BQE was covered in american flags. After the peerterican day parade you never see an errant flag. If you want some thing strapped to a car, you get a rican.

                  • dckhead_con_artist
                    • wouldn’t make it half way over the kosciuszko bridge

                    • dckhead_con_artist

                      I’m sure that Rican can spare a few of those straw chairs.

                    • bem

                      why not? 3 mph would be perfectly safe!

                    • Jim Johnson

                      That is, until a spark comes out the tailpipe.

                    • cheeseburgercheeseburger

                      there should be a merit badge for this

                    • dckhead_con_artist

                      let’s make an UBER-like app for those who need to quickly move out of their crazy ex girlfriend’s apartment.

                    • bem

                      that is brilliant.

                    • Ainigmaris Thales

                      I agree, this is a brilliant idea. And you know, the kind of guy that would sign up to be a part of this is the kind of guy you’d want to go grab a beer with. it’s not like a beta is ever going to need this, or be willing to help another guy out if he’s bailing — the beta will always side with the girl.

                    • dckhead_con_artist

                      I’ve also thought about a disappearing app…say a doctor gets hit with a $6000/month child support order. He needs to change identity, leave his car behind or sell it, and needs another person to drive him to another part of the country or Mexico, and sign a lease for him. Chances are the doctor will pay you back because for one, he’s a doctor, and #2 YOU know where he’s hiding.

                    • AutomaticSlim

                      I saw sh*t like that in India.
                      Sometimes being pulled by a camel even.

              • Max Tweeter

                I can only imagine if Edward G. Robinson’s lines in the movie were transposed for the hearing impaired in that exact way. That shit would take talent!

    • Ainigmaris Thales

      I have always wondered what the other 5 Commandment were. What if they were weird shit like “Thou Shalt Not Shear Thoust Nether Regions” or “Thou Shalt Not Bang Half Puerto Rican Chicks.”

  • UnreconstructedConfederate

    OT- when Roy Moore wins today the press is going into a Fukushima sized meltdown.

    • who’s he fighting?

      • Jim Johnson

        the press

      • UnreconstructedConfederate

        Some girls dad.

        • dckhead_con_artist

          the NRA can endorse both sides of that one.

      • AutomaticSlim

        Hahaha!

        Steve: Hey Al, you wanna go see Mikado?
        Al: Who’s he fighting?

        Roy Jones & Davey Moore…
        Two very different careers…

    • dckhead_con_artist

      that will prove the Winger song “17” is to be taken seriously.

      • cheeseburgercheeseburger

        this shoulda be his campaign song!!! headz would explode at this song today, yet ariana grand can sing about ridin a bicycle made of diks

        • dckhead_con_artist

          the green light for all of us to scour and run game at the high schools like I did in my late 30s!

          • bem

            “I’ve been cruising the jr highs all day!”
            -Booger, 1984

            • dckhead_con_artist

              Time to write my first literary piece on ROK!

              • bem

                “How to get Moore Dates!”?

                • cheeseburgercheeseburger

                  “How to get yourself indicted for a thought crime without even trying(or getting paid for it)”

                  • dckhead_con_artist

                    Even though Daddy says she’s too young, she’s old enough for me, case closed.

                • already done

            • dckhead_con_artist

              Not a violation of the 10 commandments either!

          • iBooB

            Somebody get this guy his own sitcom!

        • Bollockser

          Dude I know who wasnt even 25 yet wifed up a 33 year old divorcee’. I used to taunt him by singing “she’s only thirty-three!” haha

          • Jim Johnson

            A kid’s perception of the sexual market is so skewed. Girls think they are far more valuable than reality, boys think they are less valuable.

            • dckhead_con_artist

              it’s dudes like my friend, who has no kids, and wants to wife up twice divorced 47 year olds.

        • Consolation_of_Philosophy

          Sentiment aside, the dudes in that video look they’re the ones working to get “wrist icicles.”

          This is why grunge was a thing…
          http://www.tbo.com/storyimage/TB/20150827/ARTICLE/150829321/EP/1/1/EP-150829321.jpg

          • Jim Johnson

            Bobby Hill’s older cousin.

          • dckhead_con_artist

            they would be considered transgender morphed and cis-sexual in today’s world with that hair and makeup

            • Consolation_of_Philosophy

              If you did a cover of that song today from a gender-nonbinary, transsexual point of view, you would be lauded as the most “courageous” musician and artist of the millennium.

              • dckhead_con_artist

                because gender bending love is universal for all racial, religious, and age boundaries.

                • Consolation_of_Philosophy

                  You would’t even need to change a lyric. Just assume the “she” in the song is a trap.

                  Stunning, brave. Grammy time!

                  • dckhead_con_artist

                    and cry while receiving the award .. “wah wah..that was the best piece of ass I ever had, thanks to her father for making this happen wah”

        • AutomaticSlim

          I prefer:

    • John Galt

      Haven’t been following, but even the Euro press is piling on.
      Let the gnashing of teeth and wailing begin.

      • UnreconstructedConfederate

        If he wins they will never let up on him i bet.

        • dckhead_con_artist

          as well as the influx of messages that he will get on SugarDaddyForMe.com

          • UnreconstructedConfederate

            Like most congressmen, he’ll be swimming in poon.

            • dckhead_con_artist

              He will be the only politician on SnapChat and Tumblr.

              • cheeseburgercheeseburger

                and carlos danger/anthony weiner!

                • dckhead_con_artist

                  I thought they were on Grindr!

                • UnreconstructedConfederate

                  Wiener pics lol

          • AutomaticSlim

            Is it better than SA?
            SA kind of sucks…

            • dckhead_con_artist
              • AutomaticSlim

                Hahaha!!!

                Hey Jak/J.Nyx,

                Is there a way to reassign the comment of the day?
                Because the above is it, hands down!

                BTW, DHCA, is this one of the ones you paid with Monopoly money? That still cracks me up!

                • dckhead_con_artist

                  they are so blinded by the marketing that, I got this one in my car (one would think these chicks would see it as a red flag), fucked her, and gave her an envelope full of money printed on resume paper. She didn’t open it until I was long gone then I got the message!

                  • AutomaticSlim

                    Hahahaha!
                    HAHAHAHA!

                    When I think of the fortune, and I mean FORTUNE I have spent over the last 31 years…and all this time I could have been using worthless scraps of paper…Your son is one lucky guy to have you as a teacher!

                    • dckhead_con_artist

                      Trust me my friend, I’ve blown plenty of money too. At the end of 2015, I caught a “beta strain” ha! and it made me regret ripping them off, so I stopped for about 3 months. After all, I like most men, do have a conscience, I tried regular dating, got fucked over about 4 more times (drinks, bad dates, bitchy women..etc) then I went back to scamming haha. Now the caveat. 1 out of 3 girls will open the envelope before sex. The key there is to get them drunk enough or high on something to confuse them. You might have to bail a few times during these confrontations.

                      I got a 35 year old girlfriend now (heh) but I will soon return to SA because I miss those smooth tight 17 year old bodies!

                    • AutomaticSlim

                      Yeah, I like to drink with them too.
                      The rules become “lax”, if you know what I mean.
                      And yes, I absolutely know about being “out of commission” every now and then for a while as well…

                    • Thefourhorstmann

                      I assume ther is no rating or review function on the site. None of them ever tried to get you banned or something?

                    • dckhead_con_artist

                      NOPE! There is a primitive blog that some women post to but there are so many guys like me doing the same thing that it’s full! I had a few threaten to call the cops. Every time that happened I would text back “What are you going to tell them, that you’re a prostitute and you didn’t get paid?”

                      Also, you can call in a pre-emptive strike. Jot down their phone number, look them up on Facebook, find her parents…and then threaten her that you will tell her parents, she’s a prostitute if she does anything stupid” .. that scares the students usually, moreso than the professional whores,

                    • Thefourhorstmann

                      Yeah figured as much if they are dumb enough to threaten to call the police. I like the blackmail tactic. This is intriguing as i am a single father that gets 1 night every other saturday free. 4 months not getting laid starts to get to you.

                    • dckhead_con_artist

                      that’s what happened to me too !! I started hating life without sex and didn’t have much time to play the numbers game. This shit is easy, but like I said, there can be fallout. Either way, these women are so blinded by money or needed funds that they let their guard down and the whole interaction is less than 2 hours with a drink or 2 included.

                    • Thefourhorstmann

                      I could see starting with actually paying them until i get more comfortable with how it all works.

                    • dckhead_con_artist

                      Here’s how I got the idea. One mixed latina girl had me show up to her house within 2 days of talking. I left an envelope with REAL money in it on her kitchen counter top. She never even looked at it becuase she didn’t want to act like thats all she wanted (but we know the truth) We started making out, then the sex started but it was horrible. So while she was in the bathroom, I quickly put on my clothes, and my shoes, grabbed the envelope, and ran out the door. I started getting the hate messages within 20 minutes. Then I thought to myself, “I can pull this off with fake money!”

                    • Thefourhorstmann

                      Lol awesome.

                    • dckhead_con_artist

                      If you must go to her place wear the least amount of clothes and leave your wallet in the car. Park a good distance away from the residence. Don’t wear socks and wear sneakers. You only want to take your keys for your car . You want to be able to put your clothes on in less than 15 seconds while they are cleaning the sperm from their vaginas.. Some start drama so you don’t want them grabbing shit out of your pocket. Then just get out of there asap .

                    • Thefourhorstmann

                      Good advice. Ill keep that in mind. These chicks let you raw dog them? Definitely have to try this shit out.

                    • dckhead_con_artist

                      yeah…jump in the pool at your own risk! haha

                    • Thefourhorstmann

                      Prolly not much worse than the bar sluts i would be targeting otherwise

                    • dckhead_con_artist

                      I caught chlamydia once from a regular who I was paying! I never caught anything from my scams but sometimes I wrap it up too, just depends. Students are usually pretty safe.

                    • Thefourhorstmann

                      Well atleast it was something that can be cleared up with antibiotics

                    • dckhead_con_artist

                      that’s the only thing I ever got in my life, thank GOD!

                    • Thefourhorstmann

                      I just got the hpv but everyone has that now

                    • AutomaticSlim

                      It certainly is!

                    • Iattacku

                      and thus marks the birth of dickhead con artist

                    • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

                      Curious, you have me intrigued by the process you’re describing. What kind of fallout?

                    • dckhead_con_artist

                      just drama on rare occasions. The university students never do shit. I get the occasional message from a beta orbiter who tries to be Capt-Save-Hoe. Only interact with them on the site if you think your phone # is easily traceable. Many meet me without any other interaction other than the app. No need to exchange phone numbers.

                      ummm.oh ifa girl opens the envelope in the dark and thinks it’s fake tell her it’s the new money that just came out. If she asks you to take her home, don’t. Tell her “you’re either sucking dick & fucking or get the fuck out of my car” …. 50/50 shot. Only one started drama and kicked my car a few times, but there was no damage. Like I said the only fallout is woman drama, which we are all accustomed to.

                    • Thefourhorstmann

                      Do you use the old school 100s or the new funny money ones as the basis for your copies

                    • dckhead_con_artist

                      I use photoshop and put Steve Jobs as the Pres on the 100 bill and use serial number 0000000000. I also add the words, this is fake money and not to be used as legal tender. Just cover yourself in case a chick tries to get YOU in trouble. It’s never happened to me.

                    • Thefourhorstmann

                      Well thought out man. You are truly an inspiration

                    • dckhead_con_artist

                      it’s a war man, you gotta be in it to win. They wanted it, they drew first blood!

                    • AutomaticSlim

                      Steve Jobs…
                      Hahahahaha!

                    • dckhead_con_artist
                    • Ainigmaris Thales

                      How many chicks do you think you’ve given fake money to?

                    • dckhead_con_artist

                      Don’t worry man, there’s a new crop of 18 year olds every week in Dallas, you won’t be double dipping…just kidding..I would say about 30.

                    • Ainigmaris Thales

                      Damn… that’s a lot of dumb whores. No wonder pro whores need pimps.

                    • dckhead_con_artist

                      they decided that pimps were too oppressive, and eating into their profits, which opened the door for guys who do this. One Pro I scammed (she was good at pretending not to be a pro) had her black pimp or BF call me and told me I have one hour to pay or he will come at me. He said he knew where I lived. I responded “Where, then?” He hung up. Either the pimps have gone full mangina or they don’t want to get jail time.

                    • AutomaticSlim

                      The shotgun might have something to do with it…

                      I have an 870 HD myself…

                    • Thefourhorstmann

                      I thought you were not even allowed long guns in the city

                    • AutomaticSlim

                      You’re not.
                      I am 10 mins north of the city line.
                      So shotguns are OK.
                      Lucky me.
                      But even here pistol permits are very difficult to attain.

                    • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

                      What is a “pistol permit”?

                    • AutomaticSlim

                      Something the counties in NY state use to deprive people of their 2nd amendment rights.

                    • dckhead_con_artist

                      One day brother these women will be someone’s wife and mother….just the thought makes me cringe.

                    • cheeseburgercheeseburger

                      unreal! can you use the money from Idiocracy next?
                      http://sirbikesalot.com/user_photos/2007-09-09_idiotcash.jpg

                    • AutomaticSlim

                      And President Camacho too!

                    • bem

                      Unbelievable….

                    • Iattacku

                      you have to be joking

                    • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

                      Dude, you impress me, this whole scam you run is just fantastic, lol!

                    • AutomaticSlim

                      Yeah, we can all learn a lot from him.
                      And to think, I actually use real money…Oh what…a dope…I am…

                    • dckhead_con_artist

                      once you are banging a few, you hate going back and trying normal pickup at bars. It ruins you , because it is so easy… Supplement it with actual bar pickups, and online dating if you must.

                    • AutomaticSlim

                      I tried that online dating stuff.
                      The messages I got on Match from the 40+ crowd, with their wrinkles and cellulite gave me the heebie-jeebies.
                      Went back to the agencies real fast after that.

                    • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

                      I’m becoming increasingly convinced that online dating is a prank being pulled on men and that a single AI writes all of the female dating profiles and answers their email.

                    • AutomaticSlim

                      They spam you with fake messages from hotties right before your subscription is up.

                    • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

                      That’s what I hear.

                    • dckhead_con_artist

                      Brandon Wade, that Chinese fucker; all he wants is his money from members…

                    • Iattacku

                      what is SA

                    • AutomaticSlim

                      SeekingArrangerments.com

                      You are better off with the AMPs…

                    • Iattacku

                      What is AMP. I never tried the website thing before

                    • AutomaticSlim

                      I think I told you last time.
                      AMP = Asian Massage Parlor.

                    • Iattacku

                      Damn I forgot.

                    • AutomaticSlim

                      NP. I forget all the time.

                      But I am 51 and have Alzheimer’s setting in…

                    • Iattacku

                      I rarely use acronyms in my life

                    • AutomaticSlim

                      I don’t blame ya…

                    • iBooB

                      A single tear drop for you

                    • dckhead_con_artist

                      Seeking arrangement

                  • Ainigmaris Thales

                    “marketing”

                    See, this is why I miss Ashley Madison. They had great marketing. The vast majority of chicks I fucked off AM were not even married. They were just in it for the “danger” and the “taboo” of having an affair, doing something bad with men who were up to no good. It was literally easier to get pussy off AM than it was to order a fucking pizza. And cheaper, too.

                    • dckhead_con_artist

                      AM must have died out after the bad publicity, I presume?

                    • Ainigmaris Thales

                      Yep, now its all bots, scammers and prostitutes. To be fair, there were a decent number of those during its good days, but there were plenty of real chicks just aching to get fucked.

                    • dckhead_con_artist

                      just amazing, truly f’in amazing; yet I politely approach them at bars, dressed well, smelling good, being cheerful and I get rejected 8 out of 10 times. Like I say below, after connecting on SA, I can easily get them in my car, but getting them to talk the old fashioned way is harder, even in the safe confines of a bar or night club.

                • Ainigmaris Thales

                  Hey, screw you, hippie!

                  • AutomaticSlim

                    Hahaha!
                    I’m about as hip as the gym teacher from Porky’s…

    • Murdoc34

      That’d be fun, but I’m not at all confident he’ll win.

      • UnreconstructedConfederate

        I suppose it’s not outside the realm of possibilities but, I have a hard time believing that a liberal democrat has a chance of winning a statewide election in Alabama.

        • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

          I’m never quite up to speed on this shit, what is he being “charged” with in the court of the press? Unless I’m mistaking him for somebody else, isn’t it just dating younger *LEGAL AGE* girls? And if so, then what’s the fucking big deal?

          • cheeseburgercheeseburger

            statute of limitations on stare rape in AL is 45 yrs, all these allegations happened only 35-40 yrs ago

            • Murdoc34

              stare rape

              Worse than Hitler.

              • bem

                stair rape is worse.
                all splintery….

              • Almost as bad as manspreading or -splaining

          • UnreconstructedConfederate

            That’s pretty much it and I also don’t see the big deal.
            The thing is, he just went through a statewide primary, then a runoff and not a word was said until a month before the election. It smells of BS.

            • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

              And yet we have celebs screaming “Pedophile!” Freaking morons.

          • Jak

            He is being accused of dating very young women, the youngest woman who accused him was 14 at the time, but I believe they found out she was lying. Every other instance, the women were above the legal limit, so no foul. As my honky brethren down below stated, the fact that these women came out so soon before the election and not at ANYTIME before then, stinks to high heaven.

            • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

              I’m betting it’s all allegations, hearsay and not a shred of actual evidence?

              This Salem Witch Trial madness the last few months is really getting old.

              • Jak

                That’s pretty much all it’s amounted to thus far. One woman was actually shown to have had a divorce filing dismissed by him in the past. Can we say vendetta?

          • bem

            Court of Public Opinion. No real charges possible.

          • AutomaticSlim

            My thoughts exactly.
            He dated within the age of consent.
            Big F-ING deal!!!
            Age of consent was more reasonable back then, IMO.

    • Jak

      I have no skin in the game on this election, but I’m rooting for Roy Moore to win for nothing else to stick a finger in the eye of these liberals who think they can go about ruining whoever they want with false sexual misconduct/rape allegations.
      Perhaps it’ll convince them to, oh I dunno, try arguing their points based on sound logic rather than slinging mud everywhere? Oh, who am I kidding?

      • cheeseburgercheeseburger

        cnn was running a piece on trump’s diet coke problem(12 a day!) yesterday morning while everyone was covering the failed bomb in nyc…of course, they covered it, but to break away from it for a nothing piece like that??

        • bem

          that IS an awful lot of diet coke…..

          • cheeseburgercheeseburger

            only if you are the prez! everyone else- give you self alzheimers!

          • Murdoc34

            Our nation’s Founding Fathers set a constitutional limit of NINE Diet Cokes per day for a reason. Trump’s flaunting of the law is plain treason.

            • cheeseburgercheeseburger

              they was no diet coke back then, only Tab

              • Jak

                Was dark times back then…dark times indeed.

              • Murdoc34

                Yeah, but they KNEW Diet Coke would be invented.

            • bem

              the constitution is a ‘living document’ so no guns, no diet coke (this week)

              • Jak

                What about RC Cola?

                • That;s ok

                • cheeseburgercheeseburger

                  Royal Crown Cola? The king of England drank that shit

                  • Murdoc34

                    We fought for our right to be free of Royal Crown. I believe it was called the Cola Wars.

                    • cheeseburgercheeseburger

                      damn straight, if cnn can make shit up, why cant we?

                    • Ainigmaris Thales

                      Fucking A. I’m a Cola Wars veteran. Still have some serious PTSD from that shit.

                    • Jak

                      Post-Tab Stress Disorder? That shit’s rough.

                    • Ainigmaris Thales

                      Dude, I saw some real atrocities during the New Coke Offensive back in ’85. It was a serious clusterfuck. Had some good buddies get totally FUBAR’ed.

                    • cheeseburgercheeseburger

                      and you came home to what? dirty Futurama fans who threw cans of Slurm at you while calling you “babykiller!”

                    • Ainigmaris Thales

                      I’ll still gut any man who drinks a Pepsi anywhere near me. I carry an old, razor-sharp pop-top on a chain around my neck, just in case.

                    • cheeseburgercheeseburger

                      “give me twist- off bottle tops or give me death!”

                    • Ainigmaris Thales

                      I once sacrificed an entire bottle of Mr. Pibb just to take out a group of hardcore Sierra Mist fanatics. Dropped a hot-shot of pop-rocks in it, shook it once, and let it fly. Absolute carnage. Body parts and cola fizz everywhere. Some nights, I can still hear their screams.

                    • cheeseburgercheeseburger

                      “…the horror…the horror…”

                    • Ainigmaris Thales

                      I remember, coming back from the island of Tinian to Leyte. We’d just delivered the Classic Coke recipe… the Hiroshima bomb of the Cola Wars. A Pepsi bottle truck slammed two torpedoes into our side just after we filled the last Coke machine. Eleven hundred men went into the water. The Coke truck went down in twelve minutes. Didn’t see the first Pepsi zombie for about half an hour. Vidya gamers, all hopped up on Mountain Dew. You know how you can tell? The green froth soaking into the fat rolls on the front of their Nintendo shirt. But what we didn’t know… our mission was so secret, no distress signal had been sent… They didn’t even list us overdue for a week. Just as it got dark, when the street lights came on, the zombies came cruising. We formed up into tight groups, kinda like the old squares of battle, like Waterloo. The idea was, the Pepsi geek would come to the nearest man, and he’d start pounding and hollering, and sometimes the geek would go away… and sometimes… he wouldn’t go away. Sometimes that geek, all drunk off Mug Root Beer and raving his mad Pepsi screed, sometimes he looks right into your eyes. A Pepsi-head’s got lifeless eyes, black eyes, like a doll’s eyes. He doesn’t even seem to be living, until he bites ya. And then those black eyes roll back in his head, and then you hear that terrible high pitched screaming, and everything turns red, and in spite of all the pounding and hollering, they all come in and they rip you to pieces. By the end of the first night, we lost a hundred good men. I don’t know how many Pepsi zombies. Maybe a thousand. I don’t know how many men. They averaged 6 an hour. I bumped into a friend of mine, Herb Robinson from Cleveland. I thought he was asleep. I reached over to wake him,,, and he bobbed up and down in the water like an upended top… he’d been bitten in half at the waist. Noon on the 5th day, a plane dragging a Classic Coke banner over the beach, he swung in low and seen us. Three hours later, a fat bottle truck comes down and starts to pick us up. You know, that was the time I was most frightened, waiting for my turn. I’ll never put on a koozie again. So, eleven hunnert men went into the water, three hunnert sixteen came out, and the Pepsi-heads took the rest. June 7th, 1985. Anyway… we delivered Classic Coke, and ended the Cola Wars for good.

                    • I fought for the mercenary nation of Dr. Pepper. We had both sides paying us to fight the other side but really all we did was sit back and collect the blood money then scooped in and took over the aftermath.

                    • Murdoc34

                      I regret that I have but one up-vote to give for this comment.

                    • It;s peak internet

                    • Ainigmaris Thales

                      This is likely some of my finest work. I’m particularly proud of “I’ll never put on a koozie again” because it works so well when contrasted with the original line.

                    • Jak

                      The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the soft drinks of patriots and tyrants.

                    • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

                      We were loyal Yoo Hoo-ites and pledged ourselves to neutrality. We’ve been at peace 800 years, and don’t intend to break that trend. Our mountain bunkers make us nearly invasion proof, and every man who drinks Yoo Hoo, as all good men do, are well practiced and trained in manual arms. We’ll store your gold and offer you sanctuary, but no Yoo Hoo drinker shall ever be forced to fight for another Cola’s vanity.

                    • cheeseburgercheeseburger

                      you all should watch a documentary on the USS Indianapolis. hell, even the Nic Cage movie was good

                    • UnreconstructedConfederate

                      In the poor 3rd world country of Sams Cola we couldn’t afford to get involved. We were busy building dung and sticks huts while eating sawdust sandwiches just trying to survive. When the village diabetic had his legs taken off we had a feast

                    • Thales, you win the award for Only Consistently Readable Wall Of Text

                    • cheeseburgercheeseburger

                      took me a long time to figger out what movie he was referencing

                    • Took me exactly 4 words before i started laughing

                    • cheeseburgercheeseburger

                      well, I referenced Apocalypse Now in the previous comment, so…

                    • Ainigmaris Thales

                      Finally, a Featured Comment that is worth a damn.

                    • Murdoc34

                      Also, 14 up-votes. Which is suspicious. Some of them must be duplicates.

                    • Ainigmaris Thales

                      TBH, I’m pretty sure at least 3 of them are Russian bots,

                    • UWOTM8
                    • AutomaticSlim

                      Spiderman meets Kickass?

                    • Ainigmaris Thales

                      Goddamn, just how gay are you? Deadpool, motherfucker, Deadpool.

                    • AutomaticSlim

                      Apologies great Thales. Not up on my comic book sh*t.
                      I’ll spend more time on comics (meaning more than 0) on less on whore chasing as my New Year’s resolution…

                      This Deadpool guy. Does he pull tight young poon?
                      Just want to know if reading the comics will be beneficial…

                    • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

                      Actually, the guy who plays him is a big “thing” for women right now, he’s really funny and in decent shape.

                    • AutomaticSlim

                      Deadpool is big with girls?
                      Him, maybe I need a “Deadpool” suit”…in lieu of winning the lottery that is…

                    • Ainigmaris Thales

                      If you only know one single super hero character as an adult, that super hero character should be Deadpool.

                    • AutomaticSlim

                      I was always partial to Galactus. And Mehphisto. Have to admire Mephisto.

                    • Jak

                      You spend 0 hours reading comics? Unacceptable. For 2018, I expect you to quadruple your comic book reading!

                    • AutomaticSlim

                      Yes oh great Jak.
                      If I can figure a way to avoid puking while reading on the train, I will adhere to your decree…
                      BTW, how do I avoid puking while reading in a moving vehicle?

                • Ainigmaris Thales

                  RC Cola is just Tab repackaged.

                  • Murdoc34

                    I can’t give you a tab unless you order something.

                    • UnreconstructedConfederate

                      One day I’m going to be mayor.

                    • dckhead_con_artist

                      Mayor que yo ?

                    • UnreconstructedConfederate

                      A colored mayor? That will be the day !

                • UnreconstructedConfederate

                  With a moon-pie.

                  • Jak

                    That’s a given.

                • dckhead_con_artist

                  Radio Controlled Cola? Drone that shit to your frig.

            • Ainigmaris Thales

              It’s because he hates black people. Everything he does is because he hates black people. And women. He hates them too.

              • UnreconstructedConfederate

                TRUMP IS LITERALLY HITLER,LITERALLY! HE HATES THE CHILDREN HES GOING TO GIVE THEM LAWN DARTS AND CAP PISTOLS WITHOUT BIG ORANGE THINGYS ON THE END OF THE BARREL!

          • UnreconstructedConfederate

            The dude is PRESIDENT! He can drink ever how many cokes a day he wants to.
            If at his age that stuff hasn’t killed him yet, I say , drink up!

        • Ainigmaris Thales

          When was the last time CNN got something right? If CNN says Donald Trump drinks 12 Diet Cokes a day, it either means he hates Diet Coke and never drinks it, or he is drinking 24 regular Pepsis a day.

          • cheeseburgercheeseburger

            LOL

        • dckhead_con_artist

          imagine if he combined it with viagra and …….AND KRATOM.

      • UnreconstructedConfederate

        You’re kidding because they don’t have sound logic haha

    • Ainigmaris Thales

      I really hope Roy Moore wins… not because I care who wins in Repub vs Dem bullshit, but because so many people will have such a huge hissy fit if he does win. It’s like IRL trolling on the national stage.

      • It might be as bad as when Trump won. I love it

        • Jak

          Nah, nothing was as troll-worthy as Trump winning. The only way it can be beat is if he wins a second term.

          • Ainigmaris Thales

            I still love to look at those videos of the fucking talking heads crying after Trump won. So much lulz. I love the lulz

            • Jak

              Yeah, these people bawling when Trump won is hilarious. I was none too excited when Obama won, but you know what I did? I went out for a walk…that’s it.

            • Rachel Maddow is the best

              • bem

                I cant wait until they come at that dude with harassment charges…

                • Ainigmaris Thales

                  You know that dude has harassed some chicks, big time.

              • Jak

                I can’t stand that cunt. Even before I was big into politics or red-pilled, I came across her one day ranting on TV. After about 30 seconds, I couldn’t stand listening to her anymore.

                • bem

                  hes a faeg

                • UnreconstructedConfederate

                  I saw a pic of her before she became a bulldyke, she wasn’t too bad looking. Turning commie always ruins people’s looks.

        • bem

          I know…..and since when have any of these people given a shit about what Alabama does?

          • I don;t even care what they do and I live next door

            • Ainigmaris Thales

              Yeah, I hate Bama cause Nick Saban but I hope they pee all in the UniParty’s Coke.

            • UnreconstructedConfederate

              Me too lol

          • UnreconstructedConfederate

            Most of the time celebrities are busy trashing Alabama but today are saying how smart, wonderful and progressive they are. Tomorrow after Moore wins they will be back to being ignorant,backwoods hayseeds.

          • Murdoc34

            To be fair, it’s not about Alabama. It’s about claiming moral superiority, politicking, and eroding an already razor thin Senate majority. Actual caring about Alabama politics probably doesn’t even make the list.

            • cheeseburgercheeseburger

              has it always been legal for non residents to donate to a state campaign? Rosie Odonell make made a max contrib to the D candidate

              • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

                I don’t think she’s ever contributed to the D.

                • Boothe

                  From the looks of things “she” might very well have a D.

              • Murdoc34

                As far as I know. Another reason why the 17th amendment was a bad idea.

          • dckhead_con_artist

            they are confusing this race with the Collegiate Football Playoff.

      • UnreconstructedConfederate

        I care and even though I don’t think a whole lot of Moore I will take him any day over liberal,progressive commie democrats even though he strikes me as an arrogant self righteous dickweed.

        • “arrogant self righteous dickweed”

          You rang?

          • UnreconstructedConfederate

            I meant the OTHER self righteous dickweed.

            • Jak

              Yes?

              • UnreconstructedConfederate

                How many self righteous dickweeds are there around here?

                • How many people are here?

                  • UnreconstructedConfederate

                    All of em lol

                • Ainigmaris Thales

                  #MeToo

                  • UnreconstructedConfederate

                    Hell, everybody already knew that.duh

                • bem

                  Je Suis Le dik-weed.

                  • UnreconstructedConfederate

                    Sorry I don’t speak Surrender Monkey.

              • John Galt

                Et tu Jak?

            • AutomaticSlim

              I know who you meant!
              The guy who pays with scrap paper!

              • UnreconstructedConfederate

                That’s him!

                • AutomaticSlim

                  He’s quickly becoming my hero…

      • Iattacku

        the same with Trump’s victory. TBh the best thing about his win was the liberal tears

    • John Galt

      Well, Jones did have both main parties pulling for him, free PR attack divisions and lots of Soros cash—- just to win by 20k votes?

      I don’t know how many of those types of pyrrhic elections the establishment can win. Keep fighting and soldier on.

  • Boothe

    I believe the most important part of establishing family rules or commandments is consistency. They must apply to everyone and you and your wife must ensure that you are enforcing them equally. If a child goes to one parent, doesn’t get the answer they want and then gets a different answer from the other parent, that is a recipe for serious trouble.

    You and your wife must present a unified front. Children naturally test the limits of what they can get away with. If they see a hole in the fence, they are going through it. If the child discovers they can play you against each other, they will attempt to exploit that. If it happens enough times, they learn to manipulate people to get what they want. And many will carry that into adulthood, the workplace and their relationships.

    What I found was helpful was if a question or problem arose, my wife and I would deal with it together. Sometimes that meant she called me at work, or it might have to wait until I got home. But we were careful to always appear consistent and united. This is the type of stability every child needs in their life.

    • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

      One of our favorite phrases during the “test the fence” phase of trying to play us off against each other was “Ok, you asked dad and you say he said to ask you. When I go ask him about this, he’s going to say the same thing you just did, right?”

      • Jak

        The more fun route is to keep the kid bouncing back and forth like a ping pong match.

        “Go ask your mother.”

        “Go ask you father.”

        “Go ask your mother.”

        “Go ask you father.”

        • Boothe

          Kind of like”Kid Pong”. 😁

        • Reyngout

          If my parents each said that once, I took it as a yes.

  • It goes like this at the JnJ residence: I take care of outside stuff and repairs, Mrs. JnJ takes care of laundry, dishes, and house cleaning. Oldest girl is finally starting to grasp the concept of cleaning up after herself and even helping with rest of house.

    One day, JnJ Jr. will have trash taking and weed-eating duties and tiny JnJ-ette will assume some of househld chores. Eventually kids will be responsible for vacuuming and dusting own rooms and folding and putting away all laundry. Girls will cook one meal apiece per week and I’ll teach Jr how to grill.

    • UnreconstructedConfederate

      For a second I thought you said Jr. would be in charge of trash talking.

  • AutomaticSlim

    Furlough day today.
    It’s the only time I get to join these things in the middle…

    • Ainigmaris Thales

      TWSS

    • UnreconstructedConfederate

      It’s worth it to have a furlough day just to witness the greatness contained herein!

  • dckhead_con_artist
    • Murdoc34

      I see what the problem is. Kirsten Gillibrand is a brain dead piece of shit.

      • dckhead_con_artist

        try commenting on that board. I got banned in 1 minute.

        • cheeseburgercheeseburger

          HuffPost?

        • Murdoc34

          They can’t even correctly spell the name of the person they are trying to support.

          • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

            Why do they care? They’re not supporting him as “him”, they’re just vying to narrow the margin in the Senate. Who this dillweed is, they likely don’t know, never heard of him, and don’t care. He has a “D” after his name and that’s all they need to justify going apeshit against Moore or any other remotely non-Leftist.

        • I’m dancing over there now…

          • bem

            They just banned me for NO REASON!!!!

            • dckhead_con_artist

              just for showing up…

              • They’re still letting me go 🙂

                  • It did. Pussies can’t handle it

                    • you mean like the truth?

                    • Murdoc34

                      “Not the topic—read our Guidelines if you wish to remain part of this community.”

                      HA

                      What was the topic anyway? ‘Find ways to make this completely non-sexual comment all about sexual harassment’?

                    • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

                      Given how infamous they are for banning, this isn’t a surprise. I’ve not found many to any Leftist sites that either won’t ban you for not towing the Party Line religiously, or don’t simply disable comments because the truth is inconvenient to their views.

                    • cheeseburgercheeseburger

                      what kind of site is that? a mod’s name is “Grindr”…

                    • Murdoc34

                      His tag line: “Helping Christian men to discover their inner-gay since 2017”. More overtly sexually harassing than anything Trump could say on Twitter.

                    • John Galt

                      Or remaining silent just to get banned without notice. (cough)

                    • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

                      Roosh adopted the feminist mindset part and parcel. Now he is them, and they are him.

                    • John Galt

                      Did you get a T-shirt at least?

                    • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

                      Turns out, no. I got an email from him that sounded like he’d never once read my posts and was channeling some weird drug induced hallucination, but that was about it.

                    • AutomaticSlim

                      Have you been there lately?
                      I still post from time to time.
                      It’s getting very weird over there.
                      Lot’s of “Hitler Admirers”.
                      There’s some debate as to whether they are trolls or “skinheads”. I am thinking trolls.

                    • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

                      I went back for the first time in a month this morning, and yep, it was one giant Hitler party. Clearly, this is what he wants.

                    • AutomaticSlim

                      Funny, because he was trying to deflect some of the regulars from what he called the trolls. But no banning on his part. So yeah, it seems to be what he wants, I agree. Very strange.
                      And TBH, I am very right wing, and that crap put even me off. Not sure his angle…

                    • bem

                      he banned me?
                      No I ban HIM!!!

                    • Sir Lee

                      yea – definitely seem like trolls

                    • cheeseburgercheeseburger

                      when you get banned, do the comments automatically disappear? or does the mod need to do that manually?

                  • UWOTM8

                    That’s some pretty lethal logical sharpshooting there.

                    *two other people are typing*
                    I’m guessing their responses were essentially “REEEEE”

                  • Sir Lee

                    interesting that he was talking about what they (groupies) wish to do, but media says he admits to sexual assault

            • they had reason a priori

              • bem

                a faggoroni!

      • AutomaticSlim

        And a dried out, ugly old bag as well.

        • AutomaticSlim
          • cheeseburgercheeseburger

            that pic is faker than their relationship

            • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

              So she’s a self righteous feminist, a Leftist tool AND a beard. The trifecta!

            • dckhead_con_artist

              he looks like Mr Rogers on Aderall.

              • bem

                Mr. Rodgers would drop that motherfukker.

                • dckhead_con_artist

                  once he pulls off that wool sweater , game on.

          • bem

            I’ll not have you disparage that Fine Film!!!!

            • I want you to get this fuck where he breathes! I want you to find this
              nancy-boy @AutomaticSlim:disqus , I want him DEAD! I want his family DEAD! I want
              his house burned to the GROUND! I wanna go there in the middle of the
              night and I wanna PISS ON HIS ASHES! or is this an over reaction?

              • AutomaticSlim

                “I want his family DEAD”

                Hey, I’ll put you in my will just for that.

                • bem

                  hahahahhaa

              • Murdoc34

                Wawawait…who was before the cat?

              • bem

                This is BUSINESS!!!!

              • bem

                we’re not murderers…despite what Bonaserra says…

              • bem

                we’re not murderers, despite what Bonaserra thinks…

                • this undertaker*

                  • bem

                    you sharp-shootin’ me?

                    • bem

                      That was a hell of a shot!

                    • AutomaticSlim

                      Yeah, and with a pistol.
                      Amazing when you think about it.

                    • bem

                      Guy was running away, up stairs, you just murdered two people in public…..incredible concentration.

                    • AutomaticSlim

                      Yeah, Al was the man.
                      Michael sacrificed Rocco in favor of Al.
                      That says it all.

                    • difficult, not impossible

                    • John Galt

                      The target was an old man running in straight line up the stairs at 35 yards, so he had a few seconds of a clear line of sight. Plus it looks like he was using a S&W 38 which was standard issue for NYC PD for almost a century. Take into consideration the elevation of the target and the drop in velocity (@ 1 inch at that distance), it would be doable for a trained marksmen. Dropping to a knee would steady his balance, but he would be better off using the push-pull technique instead of steadying his wrist with his non-shooting hand.

                      Of course as he just dropped two guys at arms length and could still make the shot shows he has ice water in his veins.

                    • bem

                      All true. And Neri was no noob.

                    • John Galt

                      I read the book in jr. high and recall Al was a former cop who was canned for beating a pimp to death with his maglight. Michael picked a good one.

                    • AutomaticSlim

                      Good old Al.
                      He didn’t have to aim so hard to hit Fredo…

          • dckhead_con_artist

            AIDS patient

            • AutomaticSlim

              Or carrier.

            • Jim Johnson

              Kersey is Gillibrand?

          • bem
            • AutomaticSlim

              It says “video is unavailable”, so I have to believe it was a real doozy…

              • bem

                sorry –

                • AutomaticSlim

                  Jeez, poor Cleveland…

          • Sir Lee

            WNB

            • AutomaticSlim

              Would run like hell…

      • B1k3_Ch41N
        • AutomaticSlim

          Accident?
          Caught face first in the ugly machine?

          • UnreconstructedConfederate

            Fell out of the ugly tree and hit every limb on the way down.

    • bem

      how the FUK can you be sexually ANYTHINGED on twitter?!?!?!

      • Murdoc34

        Because Trump.

      • AutomaticSlim

        The only way that hag can be sexed is on the twitter…

      • B1k3_Ch41N
        • AutomaticSlim

          I think saw I her mother at the Triple Treat theater back in 89.

        • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

          Wash her up and have her sent to my chambers immediately!

        • Ainigmaris Thales

          WB

          • AutomaticSlim

            MT

        • UnreconstructedConfederate

          https://www.shootingillustrated.com/media/1541478/double.jpg
          Reminds me of a double barreled shotgun

          • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

            WB

            Literally.

            • Jim Johnson

              the shotgun or the chick on the fence….or both?

              • GhostOfJefferson ✓ᴺᵃᵗᶦᵒᶰᵃˡᶦˢᵗ

                Yes.

            • UnreconstructedConfederate

              Twice

        • bem

          I got a charlie horse just watching that….

          • Ainigmaris Thales

            That’s not a charlie horse, bem.

            • bem

              YOU’RE not a Charlie horse!

            • UnreconstructedConfederate

              At the risk of making your head any bigger than it already is, I think you may be missing your calling in life.

              • Ainigmaris Thales

                My head isn’t any larger than anyone else’s head. It’s a perfectly normally sized head. It’s totally normal. What’s wrong with the size of my head?

                • UnreconstructedConfederate

                  You a funny muddafucka sometimes, maybe you oughta be a comedian.

          • B1k3_Ch41N
          • Max Tweeter

            When I first saw that a few hours ago, I read charlie horse as “Charlie Rose”.

          • cholly horse?

            • bem

              HAHAHAHHAA

              YES!!!! I better go lay down in the pollar

        • Sir Lee

          WB

        • MCGOO

          I can’t stress enough how PE is the most important subject. Get all the PE you can get in public school, get your fitness award certificate and skidaddle outta there to get your Holy matrimony.

  • Dominus Antonius

    “In your anger do not sin. Do not let the sun set while you are still angry” – Ephesians 4:26

    All problems are openly discussed and immediately dealt with, as opposed to letting them simmer. Secondly, I tell everyone I love them every chance I get. You never truly know when your time is up.