Meme Master

0611 – I rush out of my Brownstone home in the decrepit Township of Fraternal Affection and scamper down the sidewalk towards my place of “employment”. I’ve got to poop so bad but I never do so at home (the wife won’t stand for it). Weekends can be tough sometimes….

Anyways, I power walk in the direction of my office building, taking in the sights as I go. The burned out metal drums, the rusted out cars, the tribal graffiti by the local dindus, etc, etc, etc. I LOVE my city. Such culture.

0638 – I burst through the bathroom door and quickly lock it behind me. I turtlehead as I frantically unbuckle my belt and drop my trousers to the floor. Before my heinie touches the seat I’ve already dropped a deuce. Ahhhhhhhh.

0642 – No paper. WTF!!?? No paper? What dik wouldn’t put new paper out? Stinking faegs. Oh, well. I didn’t really like these socks anyway. My wife’s gonna kill me. I pull out my Nokia phone and text her to let her know. This takes forever because you have to hit some numbers multiple times to get the right letter.

0714 – Finally at my desk, where I can try my best to avoid work while surfing the web. I open my 2 TB folder of memes and gifs and log onto AKC, after checking out, of course. And saying 52 Hail Marys.

Another day in the life of a rock star.

Author: Jump and Jive

Married father of three who both he and his wife were virgins at marriage. Raised by a prophet who foretold the end result of feminism. Raising his family to love God and each other and stay pure in this filthy world. Wife is stay at home mom and loves it. Leads youth at church and wants to spread truth as much as possible