Book 1 Chapter 3

Varus was tired of this dark forest. Days upon days of marching in perpetual twilight, mist swirling and decreasing visibility. This track they were on was supposed to lead them straight into the heart of the barbarians’ territory and allow them to strike unmercifully at their stronghold, but the constant strain of being alert and hearing the crashing of weapons and the screams of men, hearing of yet another patrol lost, had begun to fray his nerves.

Swiveling in his saddle, Varus looked back along the column. His men were stretched out as far as his vision spied, their packs slung over their shoulders and their sandals smashing the leaves and grass to muck. This muck then weighted down their feet until they were able to shake it off, only to have to do it again within a hundred paces. This cursed forest.

“Legatus,” was the cry Varus heard from the head of the column. He swung back around to see the tall German ancillary commander, Arminius, trotting his mount towards him. Arminius looked tired, but his eyes shone with what seemed to be triumph.

“What news do you bring, Centurion?”

The German smiled, “We are very close, Legatus. My scouts report that we are less than half a day’s march from the clearing where the settlement is. I believe we would be best served to leave the road, save for the siege equipment, and take to the forest. If we creep to the edge of the clearing, we can spring the trap.”

Varus snapped an order to one of his aides to tell the men to halt. Then he addressed Arminius, “I will have the rest of the men brought up, yes, but we will stay on the track, save for a perimeter guard. If we spread out we could be attacked piecemeal, like what has happened for the last several days.”

“But, Legatus, we could be found out if we do not hide the men. Let me take my scouts and deal with these harassers and then we can settle the men and make ready the attack. It would be a shame to come all this way only to lose the element of surprise at this juncture.”

Varus snorted, “I’m fairly certain that the men who have been harassing our patrols have already warned the settlement. I doubt our coming is a secret. No, Centurion, we will camp on the road and make our move before dawn.”

“As you wish, Legatus. I will see to my men.”

Arminius turned and rode back to the head of the column, unable to conceal his grin. It was all coming along perfectly.


*         *           *          *         *        *        *        *          *         *        *

Ulaf received word from one of Arminius’ men. In the wolf light they would destroy the invaders

Author: Jump and Jive

Married father of three who both he and his wife were virgins at marriage. Raised by a prophet who foretold the end result of feminism. Raising his family to love God and each other and stay pure in this filthy world. Wife is stay at home mom and loves it. Leads youth at church and wants to spread truth as much as possible

188 thoughts on “Book 1 Chapter 3”

            1. Sounds pretty MINOish to me. Have you gotten this approved by the Men Who Really Know About Being Men?

                    1. He is an imposter who has all the bem’s old memes in a zip file on his desktop next to all his anime porn.

                    2. you hear about the ex pharma exec who went to work in T’s admin? HHS?
                      was gonna get the prices of drugs lowered. He beat himself to death. ruled a suicide. now his fam cant even cash in the life insurance policy

                    3. Yep. Not suspicious at all. Suicide move on folks. Nothing to see here.

                      Just like the un guy about to testify against Hilldog had an accident with a barbell and his throat. Hey stuff happens

                    4. >the year of our lord 2000+18

                      Yeah, I’m gonna have to ask you to throw your self out of the airlock for this one.

    1. I thought a metaphor for moon light, you know, wolves howling at the moon. But don’t take my word for it, I’m not really good at getting metaphors, sometimes.

            1. The worst is when it plainly states in plain language what it means, and I talk myself into believing it’s a metaphor.

              I’m okay with ctenophores though.

            1. I miss a more simple time, a time when rappers would announce their name, tell you a mission statement in what it is they are here to say and inquire as to whether you know the correct time.

  1. If you combine and rearrange the letters in “Arminius” “Legatus”, it spells ‘Emulating Russia’.


    1. Also, if you combine and rearrange the letters in “Donald Trump” it spells out “Jammy was right all along”

      1. And “Jammy was right all along” can be rearranged to spell

        A jiggly straw man mollah
        Migrants hallway logjam

          1. Nah. He’s too chicken. He just faps to her all the time. Wishing he actually had a celebrity doppelganger hot wife.

    1. Yeah, I, um, I don’t really associate with either of these two groups. Although the purple hairs are significantly more distasteful to me, the Patriot Prayer guys are just young hotheads that happen to be on the right. A few months back a few of them got “caught” hanging out on top of a parking garage with a bunch of rifles and ammunition above a rally location. (Spoiler alert: the cops asked them to go home, and they did.)

      I enjoy a good street brawl, just so long as I can watch it on television and it’s way the fuck far away from me. I just don’t think it’s wise to up the ante by being the first to introduce lethal weapons.

      1. That’s unfortunate.

        The level of organization required to prevent that results in neutering. The level of decentralization necessary to prevent neutering results in uncontrolled hotheads.

  2. Days like today always make me debate whether I should “Sort by Newest” or “Sort by Best”

    1. If you sort by best, you never have to see yours or bems posts.

      You know what. Thatss a good idea. I’ll do that from now on.

              1. Real men are secire in theor masculinity and know that everyone is a little gay. Its ok. Be gay. Gay is great and happy.

            1. And I mansplained plus assumed your gender. Now I’m just gonna sit here and spread my legs so any woman that wants to sit down next to me will have to adopt a demure and reserved posture.

          1. I think it was the Cathaginians. had water and terlits in 5 or 6 story buildings, whichever height allowed the natural water pressure to reach that height

          1. Again with this “article” thing. I swear, you devious fuckers are trying to gaslight me.

              1. He needs to put “Passive Aggressive Faggotry” on his little MINO list while he is at it. And then go look in a mirror.

      1. Collectively, schmollectively. Thinking is too hard. I take all articles at face value and assume they’re the ultimate answer to what is and isn’t a man.

        1. All the true ultimate answers to what is and isn’t a man are written in a secret tome hidden beneath the floorboards of a hole in the wall bar somewhere in The Ohio.

        1. for the reasonable price of way too much money you too can be half a fag indulging in unhealthy behaviors and jerking each other off about some dream you have for the future that will never be real

    1. He needs to check his white privilege. I suggest a mission trip to Central African Republic. It is important to help those still suffering from white colonialism and oppression.

        1. You are making light of those oppressed peoples struggle. How dare you. You have slavemaster mentality.

      1. Just imagine everyone standing around, waiting for Trump to make his little pardon speech… but then, all of a sudden, he grabs an axe and just chops its head off. Then he grabs the turkey, throws it at one of his aides, and tells him to talk it down to the White House cook and put it in an oven.

              1. Because they’d all film themselves and post it on Instagram as evidence of Trump physically torturing them

  3. Funny to think about, but several centuries later the Germans had the last laugh as they moved into Roman territory and made it their own.

    A couple millennia later they even became best friends, with Germany taking the lead. Kind of touching really if you don’t look at the details.

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